Peace is freedom to be yourself and to love and marry who you want. Sometimes the initial feelings of instant chemistry can happen before we really have gotten to know a person. Old fashioned courtship may seem out-dated however there is value and safety in taking time to learn if emotional support and other values are shared as well as a chemical spark.
There are different types of love reactions and hormones are involved. Touch and the "falling in love" feeling can cause increases in the love/affection hormones, oxytocin and vasopressin, that can somewhat confuse a normal sense of caution. Over time the initial falling in love feeling will settle down into comfort and trust when there is healthy communication. Keeping some interpersonal boundaries can also be healthy, having some interests and friends in common while also encouraging each other to have some separate interests and friends supports room for each other to grow and have time for interests that aren't shared. Supporting each other at important events is good but expecting each other to take part in every hobby together may lead to resentment.
Keeping some excitement and sense of adventure can help keep the "falling in love" feeling more of a daily event. Having a monthly date night to look forward to with an occasional new activity to explore together can help keep a sparkle going even when or especially when there are young ones in the house. Children are a blessing and a partner is also. Value both and schedule some time to focus on family activities that are stimulating and some partner time. If affording a babysitter is difficult sometimes you can arrange to share babysitting duties with friends, watch their children on one night a month so they can go out together alone, and then on another night send the kids to their house so you and your partner have a date night too.
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Peace of mind and peace of soul is reached by constant work on your self, on the ability to let everything flow and go.
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